[bernie_gabrielle]

I'm applying to the Columbia University summer program for Critical Focus on the Visual Arts. However, I have no idea what to do for my personal statement. Help?

[Robinflamingo]

I usually refer my seniors to this article as a good place to start:

http://www.princetonreview.com/college/apply/articles/process/essayBook3.asp

[olly]

bernie_gabrielle, I know exactly how you feel. I've just finished the saga of the Personal Statment. I'd be happy to post mine up here for you, however it is for the course of 'English and History'. However the structure may help you... Would you like to see it?

[bernie_gabrielle]

Yes, I would! Thanks!

[olly]

No problem. Here it is (I'll put it in black font, otherwise you may see green for ever...)

Whilst studying GCSE English and History, my passion for the subjects blossomed. The stylised writing and the graphic, historical insight of the World War Two poetry that I studied combined my love for modern history with my literary appreciation of poetry.

I enjoy a breadth of reading, such as ‘Jane Eyre’ and, more recently, O’Conner’s ‘The Star of the Sea’. They evoke the epitome of beautiful language, with O’Conner’s novel set in the 19th Century; a time-period I find intriguing. I have studied early 20th Century Britain and Germany for my A-Level course. The study of History stirs a great curiosity in me; reading about critics’ differing views on huge political figures is fascinating: A. J. P. Taylor’s analysis on Bismarck’s character in ‘The Man and the Statesman’ made me question how important and influential a “great man” is on making history, and how historic figures can shape history, but not direct it.

I have read a diverse range of books to satisfy interests. My passion for literature, particularly Gothic literature, is pursued through books such as ‘The Wasp Factory’ and ‘Dracula’. I also enjoyed ‘The Eye of the Needle’, ‘The Pillars of the Earth’, and ‘Atonement’. From enjoying Stoppard’s work, I have read ‘The Importance of Being Earnest’, ‘The Birthday Party’, and ‘Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf?’ I am currently reading T. S. Eliot’s ‘The Wasteland and Other Poems’ having enjoyed some of Beckett’s and Browning’s work. My current book, Carl von Clausewitz’s ‘On The Nature of War’, alters my view on the morality of war through the intellectual arguments and perspectives presented, such as ‘war is a game both objectively and subjectively’. I engage in History through reading fiction such as ‘A Long, Long Way’, ‘The Star of the Sea’, and ‘The 39 Steps’ and also biographies such as ‘Bismarck: The Man and the Statesman’, and ‘King Edward VIII’. To maintain my interest for law, I read the Times’ Tuesday Law Supplement. Shakespearean and Ancient Greek Literature, for example ‘Antigone’, enhances the scope of my literary understanding through analysis of the intense and profound language.

The Historian L. C. B. Seaman is a fine example of an opinionated writer. In his book ‘Post-Victorian Britain 1902-1951’, he puts forward controversial views of Bonar Law, such as that he is a “political Jellicoe”, suggesting that Seaman has researched well and has ultimately come up with an opinion of his own. He has a unique literary style that has driven me to develop valuable skills in synthesising and presenting information. I find historical reading stimulating as it allows me to contextualise the literature I read within a historical framework.

My interest in Law has been confirmed through various work experience programmes and reading the Law Supplement in the Times; I could see myself in the future practising law. I have come to appreciate the importance of the use of language and assertive arguments; vital skills when studying English and History.

I have enjoyed the experience of different cultures through travel, and moving from America to England at the age of ten. Working on charitable projects for orphanages and schools in Romania and Kenya in the last two years has been a sobering and humbling experience.

I enjoy singing in the College choir and playing the piano in concerts, interests that I hope to carry on to University. I have directed and acted in plays such as ‘Loot’, ‘Confusions’, ‘Arcadia’ and ‘Chess’, and have devised a play with four other students. Drama complements my course because of the analysis and close reading involved to reveal the truth; essential skills in History. I have thoroughly enjoyed a wide range of sports including water polo, squash and rowing. My various posts of responsibility, such as Head of House, Prefect, and member of the Drama Committee, require organisation and strong leadership that will aid me in the professional world.

[olly]

[Robinflamingo]

It might be that the style and expected content of the essay is vastly different from the UK to the Murcas...the universities here seem to prefer event based, anecdotal "here is my belief system because of this life event" styled statements. I do know that if one of my students used the word "whilst", it would be considered extremely unusual, and most definitely put on. That's one of the things I love about The King's English, as opposed to Murcan...sigh.