[Lazarus (Adam G)]

"El Nino has caused high winds, heavy snow, ice and freezing temperatures in the west.
Here in the East with much mild winter weather we have been blessed.

Global warming has caused a great debate.
This mild winter makes it seem just great.

On this Groundhog Day we think of one thing.
Will we have winter or will we have spring?

On Gobbler's Knob I see no shadow today.
I predict that early spring is on the way."

Written by Punxsutawneyphil, Official Groundhog of Groundhog Day.
-www.punxsutawneyphil.com

Stick to predicting the weather, you hack.

[Sweeney Hyde]

It's out of pure fun. Get over yourself.

[jazzygirlsings]

It's kinda redundant to post this after it's been posted already...(And the sentence I just wrote is too! LOL!)

[Lazarus (Adam G)]

[Sweeney Hyde]

[Lazarus (Adam G)]

[Sweeney Hyde]

[Lazarus (Adam G)]

You're defending it as if it's your work.

I don't care if it's a 120-year-old tradition. This groundhog should be held accountable for writing such sh*t.

[jazzygirlsings]

^

You guys are fighting over groundhog poetry!

[Sweeney Hyde]

I'm defending it because it Groundhog day is just clean family fun not an art form. They try to make him a poem that is simple for all the kids to understand what he says about the weather. It's not as if they pour their souls into the stinkin' poem. And NO of course it isn't great by any means but it is just a cute little thing that they do. Now stop trying to make yourself feel better than an animal that living underground.

[Lazarus (Adam G)]

Look, this ground hog wrote utter trash, and you people are defending it as if it was pure friggin' gold!

This groundhog's poetry sounds like something out of a Frank Wildhorn musical!

[jazzygirlsings]

[Lazarus (Adam G)]

That groundhog must've been born with a silver spoon in its mouth, because I'd never hire that complacent little bastard!

[Sweeney Hyde]

ONCE AGAIN IT IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A WORK OF ART BY ANY MEANS! I THINK IT WAS IGNORANT OF YOU TO THINK THAT THE GROUNDHOG ACTUALLY WRITES FOR HIMSELF AND THAT IT IS SUPPOSED TO BE THIS EPIC POEM THAT MAKES YOU CRY! PEOPLE ARE STANDING AROUND IN THE COLD WAITING FOR THEM TO SAY IF IT IS SPRING OR NOT AND THEY HAVE TO WRITE A SIMPLE WEATHER POEM!! THERE IS ABSOLUTLY NO NEED TO CALL IT TRASH! WE ALL KNOW THAT IT IS NOT REAL AND THAT GROUNDHOG DAY IS JUST CLEAN FAMILY FUN! YOU INSIST ON MAKING IT SOME SORT OF ARTISTIC DISPLAY WHICH IT IS NOT! YOU CLEARLY DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT THE DAY IS REALLY ABOUT

[Lazarus (Adam G)]

And you clearly couldn't tell a joke even if it had a stroke right in front of you.

Turn off caplocks. It's stupid.

[Salome]

LMFAO!!!!

[Sweeney Hyde]

You never made it sound like you were joking. You made it sound as if...never mind I'm done talking to you funkiller

[Lazarus (Adam G)]

Do you seriously think I'd get pissed off at a groundhog day poem?

[Sweeney Hyde]

[Sweeney Hyde]

[Sweeney Hyde]

Without a lol or a smily or smoe sort of italics how am i to tell how you are saying it in a joking manner?

[Salome]

HAHAHAA! You thought a real groundhog wrote that!? LMFAO!!!!

[Sweeney Hyde]

[jazzygirlsings]

[lt.shaw]

even if he did write his own poem it would be in groundhogease

[Lazarus (Adam G)]

[Sweeney Hyde]

[Lazarus (Adam G)]

The Ancient Order of Groundhogees.

They keep his inner most secrets...

(By the way, the Groundhog gets his weather-predicting powers from SATAN!!!!!!)

[Salome]

[Sweeney Hyde]

...well this is an akward situation...lol

[jazzygirlsings]

[Lazarus (Adam G)]

[jazzygirlsings]

[Salome]

watch it biiitchhhhh

[Sweeney Hyde]

[Lazarus (Adam G)]

I'm going to write to Frank Wildhorn to see if he'd make a musical in the style of Cats based on the Groundhogs writings.

That'd selll, bitch.

[jazzygirlsings]

*From "Groundhogs"...a new musical adventure in the stylings of Cats*

Memory...all alone in my woodpile!
I write bad poetry all the while!
And piss off Lazarus!!!!
If he finds me, I think I'll know what true anger is!
Look, he's coming at me...with a BUUUUUUSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Sweeney Hyde]

Really it could make a good musical comedy...but not under Wildhorn. Sondheim could or Jerry Herman...

[Lazarus (Adam G)]

It's...it's beautiful!

[jazzygirlsings]

[Lazarus (Adam G)]

It has to end with a money note.

[Sweeney Hyde]

OPENING SCENE: Phil is typing at his desk. The stage is dark but for a spot on Phil and his work space.

PHIL VOICEOVER:
I was born a runty black groundhog in the urban underground. My story is strange and confusing. It is mythical even. To tell it we must ravel through the twilight zone...

[Bianca.]

[Lazarus (Adam G)]

[Sweeney Hyde]

The deep metaphor's that will intwine the show will be so complex that it would make George Bernard Shaw's head spin!

[jazzygirlsings]

[Sweeney Hyde]

[Robinflamingo]

I have a groundhog's wife in mind...
Her name is Phyllis ShadowNot
Her coat is of the shabby kind,
with ratty fur and frozen spots.
All day she sits out in the square or in the cage or in the hat:
She sits and sits and sits and sits -
and that's what makes a groundhog Fat!

But when the day's hustle and bustle is done,
And the shadow is seen and the newscast is run.
And when hubby PHil's in bed and asleep,
She slips down the stairs to the basement to creep.
She is deeply concerned with the snow and the ice -
It's freezin' their butts and they're needing some spice;
So she loads up the stove with some wood and some tinder,
She burns up the papers till there's nothin' but cinder.

(geez.)

[jazzygirlsings]

Robinflamingo, LMAO!

And to think you cracked that baby out in what...5 minutes?

[Robinflamingo]

:::bows::::

You have discovered my hidden talent.
I write worse poetry than groundhogs.

[Bianca.]

brilliance.

[Jordan]

Robin proving that Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats wasn't terribly difficult to write. You think T.S. wrote the rest of his poetry with that casual manner or just that which he wrote to his niece/nephew whomever it was?

So, it's Groundhog Day again? I thought that was yesterday?









I knew I'd end up using that again!